Highlander: Endgame – Looks like someone upset Emperor Palpatine

Number it among the greatest crimes of the century, along with the Lindbergh baby kidnapping, the OJ murders and the inclusion of Jar Jar. We’re speaking, of course, about the constant vomit of the Highlander sequels and TV show. The original Highlander movie was a smart, weird and frenetic action movie, madly miscast and terrifically enjoyable. It was also host to the most hermetically sealed plot ever — heroes with no origin, all but one wiped out by the end of the movie, and a plot device that required him to be absolutely the last Immortal, ever. Under any circumstance.

Naturally Hollywood had other ideas, and so now the planet is absolutely teeming with the bastards. Chop off as many heads as you like; they’ll be replaced by bad TV journeymen before their mullets even hit the ground. Sadly, this “more sh*t is better” philosophy has been applied to this dreadful DVD.

Two discs include extras such as an earlier (and equally senseless) cut by “The Producers of the original Highlander” — who’ll presumably be penning scripts too, if the impending writers’ strike hits this year. There are a couple of extra boob and bum shots to beef up the sex quotient, a feature commentary track with producers and the editor, the latter being the genius who hacked the film into a senseless melange of fight scenes and bad dialog. It’s actually quite enlightening listening to these Mensa-grade geniuses blabbing on about their supposed work of art.

Included for no good reason is a collection of agonizingly long deleted scenes, without any explanation as to why they were deleted, and a soundtrack so muted that you can’t hear what’s going on anyway. Two featurettes explore the movie-making process and the terrible special effects, respectively. There’s also some DVD-ROM stuff, including a character timeline that serves only to point out what a ridiculous hole-filled mess the Highlander universe is and a three-round quiz “game” that is, at least, more fun than the movie itself.

And we can’t for a moment ignore the movie. Endgame has the dubious distinction of including Bruce Payne, the mandatory English bad guy from Passenger 57, as Kell, a mandatory “bad” Immortal (although we should note that the DVD cover refers to Immortals as “Highlanders”). Payne’s presence serves only to reinforce the peculiar sensation that every bad guy in this movie could have been played by Adam Ant. His comical levels of evil also highlight the atrocious acting by everyone involved.

Lambert wanders around looking as far from Immortal as Grandpa Simpson or Dick Cheney, and his “Scottish” accent is now as French as Gerard Depardieu cycling up and down the Champs Elysees selling garlic. Adrian Paul still pulls off his TV-quality young Connery impersonation with TV-quality grace.

Navigation is certainly pretty, with some very gothic-looking titles describing the various sections on the discs, but in practice, it’s a little awkward, since the use of a circular chapter selection “wheel” defies intuition. Up is left, down is clockwise… ouch. Oh yes, and the navigation style commits the unforgivable crime of changing from feature to feature. But it could be worse, and certainly outshines the actual movie. But the volume of garbage, while certainly voluminous, is far from entertaining, informative or even welcome. Every attempt to highlight a feature in the movie serves only to remind the viewer of how calamitously poor the film is.

Overpowered Cards of Clash Royale

Today we will be going over the top five most overpowered troops in Clash Royale. So when I say overpower troops I’m just kind of referring to the truth on its own. Basically if you just put like any of the troops mentioned in this article by themselves they can pretty much do a good deal of damage without relying on
supporting troops. Now of course when you’re in a real battle you aren’t just going to put one troop down but I figured that would be the best way to judge how good a trooper really is.

This is going to be the three musketeers. So the thing about the three musketeers is that they are expensive as hell because ninety elixir and most of the time you won’t actually be able to play. This true until two times elixir actually happens now although the three musketeers do a lot of damage like they can pretty much melt any troop they get countered by pretty much almost anything a fireball, a zap and fire spirits basically anything can counter the three musketeers and that’s kind of why they’re so low on this list but I’m just going to kind of skip on over to a different battle.

This is going to be the Giant Skeleton, now before any of you guys get a bit mad at me let me explain. So the higher you get in trophies it’s pretty rare for your Giant Skeleton to actually reach the enemy tower. So the reason he’s on this list isn’t for an offensive standpoint or more so from a defensive standpoint if the enemy has just a whole bunch of barbarians, archers, or just kind of low hit units if the giant skeleton is in front of those troops it is pretty much game over. Now I’ve see from the replay in the doesn’t justify how good the Giant Skeleton is because his bomb only takes out a few troops but I’m sure all of you guys can relate to a time where all of your troops got wiped out to a Giant Skeleton or I’m sure at one point or another you’ve wiped out all the enemy’s troops with the giant skeleton. Honestly he’s a pretty overpowered offensive troop when used right and if he does get to the enemy tower it’s pretty much game over.

This is going to be the Elixir Collector so at first I was kind of debating where I wanted this card to go in the list because depending on who you talk to some people will tell you well the elixir collector is the very best card in the game and depending on others you talk to some people might just hate the card so I figured the perfect spot for the collector would just be to put it right in the middle because in Clash Royale having any elixir advantage is everything if you have more elixir then the chances are you are going to win.

This new patch came out where the lava hounds got a pretty big buff a lot of people have been running a hound cycle deck. Deck like this or just expensive decks. In general are very independent are very dependent on the elixir collector. Pretty much set him up for the rest of the battle he was able to cycle through his cards get his lava hounds out quicker and overall though the unique Elixir collector is a pretty damn good card it’s just I couldn’t really decide where to put it in this list.

This card is going to be the Royal Giant. The Royal giant is pretty much the Princess on steroids. He consignment hour from pretty much across the entire arena and he does a shit ton of damage. On top of that and not to mention he has a whole bunch of it. So he’s pretty hard to counter basically he’s one of the best cards in the game at the moment and what makes the Royal Giant even better is once you take out one tower you can just put him right on the other half and go ahead and start sniping away the other Tower and the thing about the Royal Giant is that he’s kind of like a love hate relationship with me. Now I love when I’m able to use him and just completely like an Iowa people but I hate when people use them against me and completely annihilate me but to be completely honest the Royal giant is one of the best cards in the game.

Let’s head on over to some honorable mentions. The zap and the zap spell is pretty damn good a lot of people use this zap to counter Sparky take out small troops, takeout minion hoards and most importantly to push with your hog rider. The next honorable mention is going to the balloon, because the balloon does a lot a lot a lot of damage but the only problem is it is very slow and more often than not it dies before you can even get a bomb off and the last honorable mention is not going to the lava hound but going to the lava pups the lot of pups are honestly really underestimated they attack really fast and before you know they might just take out one of your towers. So with that being said though let’s switch on over to the number one spot in the most overpowered card in Clash Royale is free diamonds just like Boom Beach. The thing about Sparky is once he fires two shots they already have a tower taken. So literally two shots from Sparky equals rip and good game. Now some of you might argue well Sparky is fairly easy to counter if you have zap and yes that is true but a good Spark user can pretty much win no matter what the circumstances are and the fact that it just takes Sparky two shots to destroy is honestly mind-blowing like Sparky without it out is the strongest / most overpowered card in clash Royale.

Disney Magic Kingdoms – A Failure or A Success?

Continuing TK Radar’s ongoing tradition of journalistic excellence, we finish our four-system coverage of Disney Magic Kingdoms with the IOS version of the game. A nearly perfect game for the IOS-owning youngster, Disney Magic Kingdoms has everything a little kid could possibly want from a game: powerups, platform jumping, toy collecting and tons of anuscide. Impressive animation, linear levels that will confuse absolutely no one and a large number of adversaries make Disney Magic Kingdoms the perfect gift for under-aged gamers.

The game starts with an animation that is slightly different and shorter than the other versions of the game, but sticks to the same plot. Donald’s main squeeze Daisy has found the secret lair of the evil Merlock, and is in the midst of some investigative journalism when she is discovered by the dastardly genius. This starts a race between Donald and his lucky cousin Gladstone to rescue the duck in distress from the clutches of Merlock.

Donald progresses through a variety of levels, each with their own theme (forest, city, and so on). Along the way he will pick up three different kinds of stars, which (when the count reaches 100) will give him an extra life. Also strewn about the paths are little milkshakes, which give Donald the power to run faster, jump higher and smash through enemies without breaking a sweat. But the fun doesn’t stop there; Donald will also attempt to collect all of his nephew’s teddy bears that are hidden very obviously throughout each of the levels.

The reason this game is such a great kid’s title is because it doesn’t really give players the choice of going the wrong way. Once he has begun a level, Donald will proceed along a well-marked path to the level’s end. Another feature that has been added for the kiddies is the obscene amount of extra lives that Donald will gain along the way by collecting stars and miniature pictures of his own visage. This makes completing the game challenging for a child, but not hard enough to cause any tears or high levels of frustration.

Taking shamelessly from Crash Bandicoot, the game holds players’ interest with the sheer amount of extras, enemies and platforms in each level. The graphics are extremely impressive, and the little dance animations that our duck hero breaks into when he stumbles across a milkshake or a teddy bear are absolutely priceless.

The only thing Donald has to worry about besides falling off a cliff are the enemies (wild animals) and traps that have been set for him in the various levels. When hit once by one of these obstacles, Donald will go from being the happy-go-lucky duck that we all know and love to the fierce and surly duck that we fear. The explosive temper that makes Donald so much fun to watch has been accurately recreated in the game, and when he takes a hit he will swirl around in a little cloud of arms, legs and beaks, issuing the Donald Duck battle cry. Go a little further on the path without being hit again and Donald will regain his composure, but a wrong step while Donald is agitated can cause the little guy to lose one of the many lives he has built up.

The bosses in Disney Magic Kingdoms are some of the most fun and creative bosses we’ve seen in a kid’s game. One is a giant chicken that attempts to drop her eggs on Donald’s head. Dodge the eggs and little killer chickens will emerge with a taste for duck blood. These chicks must be dispatched with a healthy dose of Donald’s posterior before he can focus his rear on the mother chicken. Another boss is a giant bear, which chases Donald down a path littered with obstacles. Never far behind, the bear can even become an exciting foe for an adult gamer, as he lumbers down the path roaring and swiping at our feathered friend.

Finally Donald gets to battle Merlock and rescue Daisy, and everything is wrapped up nicely in a closing animation that we won’t spoil. A great little game for ages five to 10, Disney Magic Kingdoms is a game that doesn’t substitute quality for intended audience age, as so many games do.

Jet Force Gemini – How was this Game in this Modern Era

Ever since Donkey Kong Country on the Super Nintendo, Rare has stood out as the premier Nintendo game developer. It successfully created amazing game after amazing game, including GoldenEye and Diddy Kong Racing. That’s why it’s such a disappointment that the latest title out of the UK studio is such a, well, disappointment. Usually, the company so devoted to detail makes sure that everything about their game is as perfect as can be — play control, level detail, and even frame rates. But this time out they’ve let us down. Controlling the three characters, Juno, Vela, and Lupus, is an exercise in frustration, amplified by poor camera control. Frame rates drop considerably at key moments, and even the design of the levels is less than inspired. Jet Force Gemini isn’t a horrible game, but it definitely isn’t up to Rare’s usual standards, which makes it merely an average game.

The game does contain a lot of great features. The graphics are beautiful, and the monster AI is rather impressive — enemies will hide behind crates and use covering fire to get better positions. Multiplayer features let as many as four players go head-to-head, or, once they unlock the race track in the single-player game, players can race against each other. There’s even a cooperative mode which will let two players make their way through the game. The game contains a plethora of weapons and items, and there are more secrets than you can shake a Drone’s severed head at. Gore and monster blood spatters on the walls with loud splattering noises, which should appeal to the more grotesque players. Puzzles abound, and the special effects are pure eye-candy. The game also contains the most amazing soundtrack, in full Dolby stereo, ever heard on an N64 cart. And you have to admit, the Tribals that the team has to rescue are rather cute.

Those cute Tribals, however, will quickly become the bane of your existence. One of the many goals of the game is to rescue every single Tribal in each area, a task made more difficult by their tendency to run into the middle of a firefight and the enemy’s disregard for little bear-like creatures’ personal well being. If you miss one, or one of them ends up killed, you’ll have to start the entire level over again from scratch. After restarting a level a few dozen times to get that one last Tribal, you’ll want to unload your tri-rocket launcher on the little punk.

Of course, that’s not the end of it. The game starts with you in control of Juno. Eventually, Juno manages to free Vela, and then you can continue the adventure as the female member of the team. Once you rescue Lupus, you can play as the dog, too. Each character has their own path through the game until they all meet at Mizar’s (the main evil boss) palace. With each character, you can go back to previous levels completed by the initial character, and the vast majority of the time this is a necessity, since you can only complete the game by finding and rescuing every single tribal in the game. Each of the three members of the team has special powers, and some areas require those powers to find all the Tribals. This effectively triples the game in size, since you have to go through every area three times. The frustration of knowing you can’t complete a level the first time through is only narrowly matched by the play control.

Controlling the game will be familiar to just about anyone who’s played a third-person platform game like Banjo-Kazooie — just move the control stick and the character reacts. However, in JFG, the characters don’t actually stop when you want them to. Release the stick, and they’ll continue moving forward for a second — which is extremely frustrating when negotiating precipices. On top of that, the camera seems to do odd things, sometimes coming to rest at an angle directly behind the character so it’s hard to see exactly where they’re facing. The camera also tends to keep drifting after you stop moving the character as well, compounding the disorientation.

The only saving grace is the first-person mode that lets you move forward, back, and strafe, which makes walking across narrow planks easier. The first-person mode also contains a targeting reticule for manually aiming at the enemy. However, even this mode has problems. By holding down R to enter the first-person mode, you can move this targeting crosshair around the screen. Once you get to the edge of the screen, though, it moves the entire perspective of the character, making it difficult in the extreme for precision facing.

On a positive note, the levels are simply huge, and the environments within those levels vary from rainy swamps to pristine corridors. There’s a lot to find, and there are enough new items and weapons to keep players interested in going through each level. The soundtrack is epic stuff, and really should be attached to a better game.

For any other developer, this would be an impressive, yet flawed, game. From Rare, it’s a minor disappointment. However, there’s still some fun to be had, and we do encourage you to check it out. Just don’t expect too much, or the letdown may taint your hunger for Donkey Kong 64, which promises to be much, much better.

Nyko Deluxe Carry Case / Game Tote -Review

The best thing about the Game Boy Color is how you can take it anywhere. There’s nothing like taking a game unit everywhere you go so that you need never fear any random moments of boredom. Because Nyko understands the need for the GBC to be ultimately portable, the company has come up with a variety of ways to keep your games safe while you slam them into your backpack or jacket pocket. And these two cases are simple, easy ways to make sure your games are protected wherever you go.

The Deluxe Care Case is a plastic case about as wide as a Game Boy Color, about two inches longer and about twice as thick. The case holds 12 Game Boy games in slots designed to fit them securely, and the unit folds closed with a plastic lock that assures that they won’t go anywhere. The plastic is fairly durable (it reminds us of some of those older, thicker plastic cups) and the lock is strong enough to make sure it won’t fly open unexpectedly. Actually, the lock is almost too good — it can be a bit of a pain in the fingers to open. The slots that hold the 12 games — more than enough for any long trip — hold them nicely securely, and as a bonus they also handily fit PlayStation memory cards (both PSOne and PS2, since they’re the same size), which means portable players can take memory cards for their PSOne with them to Grandma’s house.

The other unit is the Game Tote, which holds four Game Boy games in a folding plastic case. By using little rubber “feet” that come with the Game Totes, it’s possible to stack multiple units for extra storage, but two of them are almost as big as the Deluxe Care Case and only hold four games. These are much thinner, and will slide much more easily into a backpack.

Ultimately, these carrying cases are handy for those who want to make sure to protect their investment when it comes to Game Boy games. In many cases, players just tend to toss their game into a bag or pocket, and these cases will certainly help prevent damaged games. However, they are still a bit bulky, and take up more room in a bag or pocket than just the games themselves. If you’re interested in individual protection, Nyko still has you covered. Remember those plastic cases that used to come with Game Boy games? Well, Nyko’s Game Pak Cases are officially licensed by Nintendo, and you can pick ’em up in packs of six. But if you’re looking for something to keep a group of game paks safe on your next flight to Auntie Anne’s, the Deluxe Care Case and Game Tote certainly do the job adequately.